Fitting In

I struggled this morning on how to title this blog. My second battle comes from how to  word this blog without coming across on a soap box or something. Oh well.. here we go… I’m just going to give you my words and let it be what it is.

As I was getting ready for work this morning, I was thinking about something my boss asked me on Friday. He had asked me if I was going to the Thanksgiving dinner with the other ladies in the office. Every year the corporate staff get together at one of their homes and have a dinner celebration for Thanksgiving. They also do this for Christmas as well. I never go. They always invite me, but I never go. So he then asked me why not. I said, it’s just not really my cup of tea. He explained how I would have fun if I went, but still I said no thanks.

I was thinking about it this morning. There is nothing wrong with the other ladies and my reasons for not going has nothing at all to do with them but everything to do with me. First of all my birthday is the very next day and my hubby and I are going away for the weekend. Sorry ladies, but I would much rather spend some quality time with my husband than spend the night chatting about nothing at all with you guys. Other reasons include: the driving distance from my house to theirs (at the end of the day I just want to go home) afterall I’ve already been with them all day!; these ladies are nice and all, but nothing at all like me… we have no real connections, they have connections with each other and so I’d pretty much be there as a witness to their conversations (not my idea of a great night).

The biggest reason is that I really don’t need their acceptance into their group (which is what it feels like) and this is where I’d like to explain a bit more.

As a child something my mother instilled in me was that if someone doesn’t accept you as you are, then you don’t need them in your life. Growing up with this in mind, I was always one of those kids with just a small hand full of really good friends, not one of those who was always surrounded by loads of “just ok” friends. This was of my choosing. I never felt the need to do things, wear certain brands of clothing or anything else to fit in with any group. I did me. I did my own thing, I was who I was and I am who I am.. no pretenses, just me. That same thing carries over to today. I am still me… doing me every single day.

This brings me back to the Thanksgiving and Christmas dinner with co-workers. I don’t feel I should feel bad about not going to their dinner and participating in after hours activities with these ladies because whether I go or not shouldn’t change their opinion about me. I should be allowed a choice without worry about being on the outside of the group.

My not going doesn’t mean I don’t like them, it just means I don’t want to go. I’m not being a snob, I don’t think I’m better… the fact is I’m just different than they are and that should be ok. We all should be allowed to be who we are without the worry of acceptance by others.

Many Blessing,
Angel Guide





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